Thursday, January 29, 2009


How about this Economy huh? Boy does it blow. I had to let go of the one employee that runs my lemonade stand that I put up in front of my house. So now I have nothing to do on Saturdays. So to make ends meet, again, I have to rent out space on my blog to the classified ads.


PERSONALS
Portly Male Real Estate Tycoon ISO Sexy Female Banker
I own houses and hotels from Mediterranean Avenue all the way to Park Place. Why not chance a turn with me? Are you currently incarcerated? Not a problem. I can have you released from jail without having to pay a dime. I have plenty of free parking, a scottish terrier, and a small iron you can use to press my tux. Must have nice community chest.

HOUSE FOR RENT
2 Bedroom/ 1 and a half Bath, 35 sq ft, gingerbread home in desirable neighborhood. Remodeled bathroom and kitchen, new frosting roof. Convenient location-25 colored squares from Lollipop Woods, 76 from Gumdrop Mountains. So easy to locate, a child could do it. Winding colored path leads to front door. Nice view of Molasses Swamp. No Pets.

FOR SALE
Orange Hippopotamus - cheap! I can no longer afford to purchase food for this starving hippo. I am constantly disciplining it by smacking the lever protruding from it's backside, but that doesn't seem to help. It never stops eating. Never! I'm losing my marbles here!

3 comments:

Scotland Barnes said...

Mediterranean Avenue? - That place is a dump!!! And that little dog of Unlce Pennyworh- urinates all over that two-star shit-hole. Also - have you ever had to sit though Pennyworth's endless stories? - if I have to listen to that bloated bastard tell me about winning the beauty pageant again - I swear I'm going to cut his brake lines the nest time he passes Go.

That's why I stay over at New York Avenue.

And yes - I have nothing better to do than to think up Monopoly related jokes....

Mike said...

Brilliant!

m3ng said...

Guffaw! You are one funny dude.