Well I just got back from my trip to a different kind of China. Chinatown, San Francisco to be exact. That's where this year's Hobo-lympics are underway and BOY what a great year! The opening ceremony was amazing! Hearing the Hobo-lympic theme being played only on washboards and the spoons is truly beautiful.
I was lucky enough to see famous hobo-athlete 'Skitts McRash' compete against rookie 'Janky DownFly' in the 100 meter Run-n-Babble event. Then we grabbed a couple cans of Hobo-lympic sponsored baked beans and caught 'Stinks Malloy' go head to head against 'Professor Scabs' in the Floor Spare Change competition, brought to you by Subway. (Well it was in front of a Subway, anyhow)
There was even some alleged scandal when 'Knifey "the knife" Stabstab', attacked 4 time gold medal winner 'Twitchy SkullCap Jitters' (pictured above) with the metal lid of a cat food container during the BackAlley Dumpster Diving competition. Even with deep lacerations, Jitters took the gold and during the awards ceremony, used his middle fingers to show the audience who was "number one". (It was ironic considering the "metal" around his neck was made from a cat food lid.)
We were about to catch my favorite game, the Individual Obscenity Screaming event, when the police showed up and put an end to the games early this year. But before that, I did get to talk for a bit to 8 time Gold medal winner for the Bindle Toss, hobo-lympic star 'Gums McRazor' which was a treat. I asked him how confident he felt this year about bringing home the gold, and he said to me, "I can gold MY OWN time with the devil and a wiffle ball bat, scruffy." Then he picked a fight with a parking meter.