Monday, February 25, 2008

Conversation with a Canadian

Professor Cooley- Welcome to "Conversations with Canadians", I'm your (American) moderator, Professor Cooley. This is Part 12 of our 43 part series. Today our guest from the North is Canadian, Nick Sung. Welcome Nick.

Nick Sung (Canadian)- Hiya Josh, it's a pleasure to be here; really. In this interview, and in America!

Professor- So........why are you here? Are you a Canadian draft dodger?

Nick Sung (Canadian)- No, I'm a draft beer dodger, Ha Ha.

Professor- Just answer the question, Canuck.

Nick Sung (Canadian)- Um....okay,... I'm here because I enjoy higher gas prices and paying for health care.

Professor- Interesting, very interesting. When you came into the States, or America, did you have any fruit with you?

Nick Sung (Canadian)- No, just a loaded gun under the passenger seat. But I enjoy an occasional nectarine.

Professor- So...why do people live in Canada... I mean, except for all the people in the Witness Protection Program?

Nick Sung (Canadian)- Canada really is a great place to live, and for so many reasons--a bright, liberal, democratic society, rich multiculturalism, a economy on the upswing. Former Governor General and Liason to the Queen Adrienne Clarkson once said, "Lookit how much wheat we've got; wheat." So I like to think about that. Wheat.

Professor- Besides maple syrup and Pamela Anderson, what are some of Canada's other exports?

Nick Sung (Canadian)- Canada's economy is actually the eighth largest in the world. Naturally we're a rich provider of naturally resources, petroleum and lumber, nickel, uranium, diamonds and lead, but you might be surprised to know that Canada also produces a large number of motorized geese.

Professor- That Pam Anderson! If I played hockey with her, I'd give HER a body check! AH HAHAHAHAHAHA! Do you get it?

Nick Sung (Canadian)- Yes... yes

Professor- Speaking of hockey, what's up with that?

Nick Sung (Canadian)- It's a sport.

Professor- Indeed,...Now that you've escaped from Northern Mexico, is there anything you'd like to say to the rest of the Canadians stuck living in Canada?

Nick Sung (Canadian)- I'd say: I got out, Celine got out, Owen Hart got out, and he won the belt--and you can do it too.

Professor- Lady Liberty is a tempting mistress, isn't she. Well Nick from Canada, thank you for spending your time here today on the internet, addressing real questions with real answers. I just hope that some day, both our countries will be able to come to an understanding, and stop hating each other. That's my dream.

Nick Sung (Canadian)- Yes... n-yes.

Professor- Thank you Nick,......Hey doesn't Canada look like it's a hat sitting on America's head? HA HA HA HA HA HA HA

Nick Sung (Canadian)- Thank you.

Unlike my imaginary friends, Nick is one of my real ones. He is way too talented for his own good, and a real good sport. He is my favorite Canadian (besides Pamela). Check out his beautiful work at....


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